So, I just want to take this moment to thank the Water Department (for lack of a better name) for slowly killing me with their song. It’s bad enough I’m uber paranoid about germs and what not but now our drinking water has drugs in them. Great. So the traces are miniscule but I just know with all the pharmaceutical drugs that have been detected, I’m prolly gonna end up all Heath Ledger like on my bed on day. Don’t worry, I’ll be clothed.

How does the water affect us locally? According to the linked article:

Several Texas cities were included in the study. Dallas officials said the results of drug screenings are not complete. Five drugs were found in Arlington water, but officials would not identify them, citing security concerns. Austin officials said tests there were negative and Houston doesn’t test for drugs.

Note to self, don’t live in Houston and Arlington peeps are idiots.

But I don’t know where the affordable part comes in. With all new way-too-expensive condos and apartments filling up space everywhere, sooner or later the cheapest places in town will also be the skurriest. But it’s nice that Dallas is on a good list. We made the top ten of Forbes Ten Most Affordable Places to Live. This is what they say:

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7. Dallas

Like Houston, Dallas is one of the fastest growing cities in the country, with domestic migrants leading the pack. The city itself is a bit more centralized than Houston, has better air quality and better access to public transportation via its DART train. It trails Houston slightly when it comes to cultural institutions like museums, libraries, parks, sports, theaters and universities, according to Sperling’s Best Places. Cost of living is slightly higher in Dallas, which was the main reason it landed behind Houston.

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Now why hey used that old expired West End as the Dallas spot is beyond me since all the others look appealing. West Village maybe? For the rest of the list, go here.

Yikes! The infamous south of the border myth might just be true. Some lady in Cuero, Texas found bodies of dead animals that she can’t identify but believes them to be the Chupacabra which is Spanish for “goat sucker” so she chopped off their heads and sent them to scientists. Being that she’s a hunter, I guess that was the first thought that came to mind. Anyway, get the clearer story here via AOL. Athough, I think they may just be Xoloitzcuintli dogs which aren’t all the uncommon in Mexico. 

Folklore like this always fascinates me. I totally believe in Bigfoot and it skurrs me to death. I would personally oversee a Bigfoot Genocide just to alleviate my fear of ever coming across one. Sorry PETA. The Chupa thing though I never had much thoughts on. The head looks cuh-reepy but the other pics aren’t super weird. Maybe it’s some weird breed of dog and wolf or just some effed up dog. So I wonder what the DNA testing will come up with. And if they’ve migrated up to that close to San Antonio, will they creep on up here to Big D? Scary but maybe they can take care of our rampant stray dog problems.

The best part of the article were the comments however. I only went through a few out of over 1500 of ‘em. Wow. I’ve copied some of my favorites below:

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whosonfirstyou 06:21:12 PM Sep 01 2007
Viva La Chupacabra ~!!! You’d think this idiot woulda kept at least one of the three intact to let science figure out what kind of pendejo this is. Another stupid azz Texan.

ronband 06:21:09 PM Sep 01 2007
Chupacabra…isn’t that an entree at Taco Bell ?

fourbubbles 06:20:46 PM Sep 01 2007
The ugly head is on the hunter!

If I had known that Tyler’s KYTX-TV had such low standards for their news anchors, I would have applied there a long time ago. For some reason or another, I had in mind that maybe I needed to finish off my broadcasting degree and gain more experience or something like that Apparently not as Fox’s new reality show, Anchorwoman is being filmed at the station with Lauren Jones at the anchor desk, a model/soap actress/WWE host (hence the ambition?). Soon after watching, I immediately detailed plans to rebudget my intended tuition money toward plastic surgery and debated a sex-change operation. 

…but how do things start looking down there after all this?

Ya know, I’m not the most scholarly Christian but I don’t remember being taught this at anytime. I thought it was just zebras and giraffes and stuff like that.

New museum says dinosaurs were on Noah’s Ark

Now, wouldn’t Rex have had a lot to eat those 40 days? Or maybe he did and those critters all got extincted.

Thanks to the breaking news from the Plano Star Courier -

Denton’s only gay bar, Mable Peabody’s Beauty Parlor and Chainsaw Repair, went up in flames destroying everything yesterday. Not much to say because I’ve never been but it was pioneering for the LGBT community of Denton. And the Ex-Boyfriends played there before doing a show here at Bar of Soap.

Interestingly, fire marshalls deem it arson but not a hate crime. Not to jump to conclusions but sort of wonder if it has anything to do with this. Maybe?

Read David Webb’s article about the unfortunate incident.  

I figured there was something wrong with this story from the beginning. A friend received a call in the middle of the night with screams yelling help? They show up at a gas station unharmed asking the attendant to call the police? And it was all a hoax.

Turns out the two missing Terrell women that went missing the other day made it all up because they missed their curfew and according to this, wanted to stay out partying. Then people (cops, parents) are saying “we’re just glad to have them home”, “everybody makes mistakes”.

Hellll nah.

Search parties were in the works and police were having to deal with this. I say rack up the time police spent on this, come up with a figure and have them pay back the city. Throw in about a hundred hours of community service as well. The article made no mention that 20-year-old Sasha Abney, a student at Southwestern Christian College, and her 17-year-old cousin, Bryshada Ward, who attends Terrell High School will be charged with fraud or whatever.

I find these chicks disgusting. All I can say is karma is a b!tch and these chicks need to be double careful they won’t find themselves all chopped up and dumped on Dowdy Ferry Road.

Lying beyotches Bryshada Ward (left) and Sasha Abney

In case you forgot what they looked like:

Throw an apple core at ‘em.

Spin the wheel and see how Ann the Man has a reputation of putting her hoof in her mouth. But you knew that already, eh?